They called the study "Oreology," and they used 3D-printed instruments called "Oreometers" that could hold the Oreos, and then apply precise, varying levels of pressure and torque to carefully open them up.
After an exhaustive process, the researchers found . . . well, nothing.
There's no secret trick to opening an Oreo perfectly evenly. It will almost always split with more crème on one side . . . and that side will be more delicious.